MPW Insider is an online community where the biggest names in business and beyond answer timely career and leadership questions. Today’s answer for: Why is it important to have a mentor? Is written by Debby Hopkins, CEO at Citi Ventures.
One of the most valuable and fulfilling aspects of my career has been mentoring others and being mentored. It’s something I strongly encourage on both sides of the professional equation for many reasons, and it can be especially valuable at early stages of innovation and discovery. In order to make a lasting connection when seeking a mentor, here are some important things to keep in mind:
It doesn’t happen over night
Like any relationship, mentorships grow and develop over time. Often, people talk about being assigned a mentor or asking someone to be their mentor. A lthough it’s fantastic when mentors are introduced through formal programs, it’s important to keep in mind that a mentorship is an affinity between two people–which often happens organically.
Be optimistic
My best mentors have come from the most unexpected places and at unexpected times during my career. Be receptive to advice and insights that might initially surprise you. You may discover a mentor in the form of a client, a former colleague, or co-worker from a different department within your company. An unanticipated perspective may provide insight that you never realized you needed.
Trust each other
A strong mentor knows exactly what makes you tick. This means a deep understanding of your strengths, weaknesses, and habits. Once you’ve established a trusting relationship, be sure to share your goals and aspirations. Engage and listen to their suggestions—they will help you maintain your authenticity.
It’s a two-way street
With any relationship, it’s critical to balance the give and take. As a mentee, you want to invest in your mentor as well. Remember to respect his or her time, ask thought-provoking questions, and share interesting learnings. You will only get as much out of the relationship as you put in it.
Be proactive
Mentors are only beneficial if you utilize them effectively, like when you’re at a crossroads in your career. And although s ometimes the right counsel is hard to hear–your mentor may tell you to stick out a difficult job or manager–i t’s in your best interest to take their advice.
I’ll admit, there have been times I’ve avoided my mentors when I had to make a tough decision. I could anticipate exactly what their advice was going to be and it wasn’t what I wanted to hear. But anticipating their response is ultimately what drove me to push myself harder, and in the end, I heeded the advice that I never initially sought. As your mentor relationship grows, hearing his or her voice in your head–almost like a second conscience–will help you learn from your mistakes.
Read all answers to the MPW Insider question: Why is it important to have a mentor?
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What qualities make a good (and bad) mentor?By Karen Tegan Padir, president of application development at Progress Software.
Why mentoring is unlike any other professional relationship by Jenni Luke, CEO of Step Up.
Why you don’t need a mentor to be successful by Beth Brooke-Marciniak, Global Vice Chair of Public Policy at Ernst & Young.
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The most important quality a mentor should haveby Kathy Bloomgarden, CEO of Ruder Finn.
Why women are more likely to be mentorsby Alyse Nelson, CEO and co-founder of Vital Voices Global Partnership.
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Why this AOL executive chooses her mentors — wiselyby Allie Kline, CMO of AOL, Inc.